Friday, April 22, 2011


Does love last forever? According to my 100-year-old grandmother, it does.  Her husband passed away 20 years ago, and yet she still had a lifetime with him. A lifetime filled with endless love, an abounding friendship and an assured mindset. Their love was unquestionable, which made it even more amazing. Their love lasted from life until death.

“...until death do us part…”  But to hear my grandmother tell it, their souls have still never parted. She calls him her lover, she kisses his picture everyday, she relives fond moments with him in her mind. She keeps his spirit alive in her heart. They truly have a love that has lasted forever (at least, their version of forever)!

But do those kinds of love still exist? I look around me and people’s actions constantly remind that those loves don’t exist. People’s actions are telling me that you can love and then leave. People’s actions are telling me that love only lasts through the infatuation stage, and once that’s gone, it’s okay to move to the next one. People’s actions tell me that love gives up easily.

But long-lasting loves are also not perfect loves either. If perfect loves existed, they would be boring loves. The challenges, arguments and trials add character to the relationship and many times makes it stronger.  

So long-lasting loves can exist as long as both individuals aren’t expecting perfection, but continue to strive to get close to it. Long-lasting relationships are a balance of reality with fantasy, work with play, and challenges with joyfulness.

It’s funny because I’ve dreamt about my wedding a couple times recently; and each time, the wedding is a perfect disaster. Either my dress is a mess or I have no bridesmaids or I forget to send out invitations—something always happens that makes it horrible.  But the dream always ends with my seeing Lawrence as I walk down the aisle and immediately have a sense of things being okay. The mere sight of my groom-to-be lets me know that things aren’t ever going to be how we planned; but as long as we have each other, we will be able to make it through. 

My dreams tell me that long-lasting loves can exist if you always value and appreciate each other in your lives.

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