You always hear that communication is the key to healthy relationships. In fact, you hear it so much that you start to dismiss it—it starts to become cliché. But no matter how overused “communication” may be as the cure for broken or unhealthy relationships, it really is necessary.
My boyfriend and I learned how necessary communication is this past weekend. Through communication, we learned that our relationship was actually a lot stronger and closer than we had thought. Issues that we thought we had in our relationship were actually misunderstandings. By us discussing what frustrates us and upsets us, we were able to understand and relate to one other.
But before we started communicating, we were acting immature in many ways.
Frustration brings immaturity out of people. When couples are frustrated, they start ignoring each other, hiding their anger, and doing things to purposefully make the other mad. Frustration makes couples act in ways they don’t want to act. It brings out the primal instincts in each individual: I am angry. He is making me angry. He is angry. I am right. I need to defend myself.
When couples don’t communicate, there are a lot of singular-focused thoughts and actions. Couples can’t actually start performing as a couple until they know the thoughts and desires of the other.
So that’s where my boyfriend and I are right now…learning the thoughts and desires of each other. We are learning that when something comes up that upsets us, we need to talk about it right away. Our love for each other is intense, so usually our discussions or arguments are based upon misunderstandings. But we usually don’t know that until after we’ve debated for hours and have gotten angry. In the future, we are trying to cut out the hours of debate…
…Communication is the key to my happiness today becoming my happily ever after in the future…