Wednesday, May 18, 2011

The Answer I've Been Looking For


I love you. But you make me so mad sometimes! I love you, but you get on my nerves sometimes. You annoy me sometimes. You frustrate me sometimes. You upset me sometimes. BUT, I love you. 

Sometimes I think you could measure love by how much the other person frustrates you. I say that because if they frustrate you and you still want to be around them, that must demand a high level of love. 

My boyfriend upsets me, but he also understands me. My boyfriend frustrates me, but he also frees me. My boyfriend annoys me, but he also answers me. He answers my question. My question of what man will love me the way I deserve to be loved. The question of who is the man for me. The question of who will I spend the rest of my life with. He answers all those questions—he is the answer.

But sometimes the answer isn’t always understood. Meaning, other people don’t always understand that he is the one for me. And, frankly, I’m not sure why. But I’m also not sure why or if I should care. I guess I just want my answer to be everyone’s answer. I want everyone around us to know that he is the absolute right one for me. I don’t want to have to defend my answer. 

Defending my answer makes me second guess my answer. It’s like when someone asks you something, you can give a definitive answer until they start asking you all the follow-up questions and the "whys." Then you start second guessing yourself, and back tracking, and justifying.  I don’t want to do those things when it comes to my relationship. 

Therefore, through the frustration and through the hard times, I love him. He is my best friend, my supporter, my comedian, my partner—my answer.

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