Monday, February 28, 2011

Higher and Higher...Closer to Our Dream

Reaching new levels in relationships—progressing from love to partnership.  

As relationships progress to the next level and elevate in richness and quality, there has to be more than just love. There has to be more than the “baby I love yous” and “baby I miss yous.” There must be something deeper, because the intense “in-love” stage is fleeting and what you’re left with is work. After the first year of a relationship, the desire to call every five minutes and the adoration for his “quirky” qualities wear off, and you are left with a man who is starting to annoy you.  You still love him, but the infatuation has diminished. That is why it is so important to not just have a lover, but have a partner. Have a mate that is also your friend, also your consultant, also your helper; because if you have those things, when the “in-love” stage fades, you can progress to the “in respect” and “in appreciation” stages.

This progression is what my boyfriend and I are attempting to transition to now. He and I are using each other as advisors to our career paths, consultants to our life’s problems, and guides to our personal journeys. Our desire is to be involved in every aspect of each other’s lives—fully integrated in order to know each other completely. 

This integration is not always easy; it takes work sometimes. The process of involving someone else in your business, seeking their advice for your issues, planning events around them is not always natural or instinctive; therefore, it takes work. But the work is highly gratifying. It’s gratifying when you are struggling with a tough issue in your life and are too proud to talk about it with someone in fear of judgment; but when you do finally solicit the help of your boyfriend, he is super understanding and helps you work through the issue. 

The way your mate responds to situations can also enhance your love for them. So, in a way, as I’m transitioning from lover to partner with my boyfriend, our partnership may be just a fuller, more encompassing level of love and adoration. 

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