Monday, February 21, 2011

A Match Made In Heaven...Despite The Circumstances

I’m so in love! I feel so content, so settled, so happy! 

My boyfriend is in town and it is wonderful—wonderful because we are able to express our love through actions and gestures. As I’ve mentioned before, because we are in a long-distance relationship, we sometimes feel like our love is limited, stifled. But the moment he got in town, the door of our love was opened. We were free to explore the depths of our love. We were free to delve into the crevices of our desire. 

What we found in our exploration was adoration and respect in addition to the love. We found that we not just love each other, but we complement each other.  We fix the flaws of the other. We mend the mistakes of one another. But we also enjoy many of the same things, so watching TV, going to the grocery store and picking a restaurant aren’t issues. 

Our time together has truly affirmed our affection for our each. When he and I are able to spend significant time together, there is no doubt in either our minds that we are meant to be together…

However, when we are able to spend time together, it also highlights the fact that our time together will not last. So when he visits it’s a bit bittersweet because the happier we are spending time together, the sadder we will be when we have to separate. As a result, we play this game with ourselves where we try not to think about the day he is leaving until that actual moment approaches. Until the time comes for him to get on the plane, we force ourselves to ignore the fact that this current situation is not our reality. This current situation where we wake up together and hang out all day, make meals together, watch our favorite TV shows together, visit friends together is not our reality. It’s a temporary fix to our circumstances. Our circumstances say that we live apart and since we live apart our relationship will not be as meaningful, as deep or as visceral. But we know in our souls that is not the case, so we do things (i.e. visit each other once a month) to override our circumstance.    

The feeling that we have for each other when we are together is undeniable, it’s a feeling of bliss! We must change our circumstance, so can enjoy this feeling indefinitely…

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