Monday, November 22, 2010

Is There an "I" in "We"?

What does it mean to be in a relationship? Does it mean you are supposed to deny your own personal wants and desire to satisfy the desires of “us”? Or better yet, does it mean that you must give up all of yourself to demonstrate how much you are willing to put into the relationship? The selfish person in me believes that neither has to be true. And I only describe myself as selfish because that is the label that others (mainly the guy) put on me when I want to do things for ME. But I believe that neither has to be true, because I truly think that any strong, healthy relationship has an element of individuality in it. One must know who they truly are as a person in order to give any of the themselves over to another person. But how can a person really, really know what they want and what they need when their wants and desires are contingent upon another person’s wants and desires?

My answer is: you can’t! So what does it mean to be in a relationship? Well, to be in a relationship with me, means that we both still have our own lives and friends. We both still have our own hobbies and our own taste in music. We both still spend time alone with ourselves and deliberately factor in time away from each other. Most importantly, we both understand that we don’t need each other, but we both really want each other in our lives. But…since I am single, this is all hypothetical, so let’s see what I’m saying once I’m in a relationship again! ;)

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