Showing posts with label self. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

A Matter of Choice?

Is it true that men are unable to multi-task and think comprehensively?  Or is it that they choose not to do multiple things at one time, choose not to get involved in the details and choose not to engage on all levels? 
Are they really incapable or is it a choice?

As women, we experience multiple situations where we’ve asked the man, our man, to do something and even though they’ve agreed to do it, they wait a long time to get it done, don’t do it all the way, or totally forget to do it altogether.  So are they really incapable of doing what you’ve asked them to do in a timely manner or is it that they don’t choose to do it until they feel like it?

I’m starting to think it’s a choice…

I’ve asked my boyfriend on multiple occasions to please check his work calendar and find a weekend that he has off so we can plan a vacation together.  To me, that seems like an easy thing to do.  But for some reason he has yet to do it. 

Surely, he’s capable of checking his calendar and seeing when he will be off, so by process of elimination I must conclude that he chooses not to do it. 

I don’t think he makes the choice to not do something maliciously or even intentionally.  I believe he chooses not to view it as a priority and, consequently, forgets to do it. 

Maybe that’s it.  Most men view half the things women request of them as a low priority... 

Take out the garbage?...low priority

Mail something for me?...low priority

Call me at a certain time…low priority

Call the insurance people?...low priority

Feed the kids…low priority

Take the dog out…low priority

Pay the bills…low priority

Or maybe it’s the fact that we “the woman” have requested it that they view it as low priority.  So if they’ve thought of it themselves, all of a sudden, it’s a brilliant idea that needs to be handled immediately. 

So I’m shifting my energy away from getting him to do something that I’ve requested and toward getting him to come up with the idea himself…you know, let him be the man!  ;)

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Drifting Away

Photo by Rick Sampson
I feel myself pulling away from you. I’m not sure why and I’m not sure when, but I definitely am.  I don’t feel as close to you.  The love is still there, but the emotion is not. 
I have this strong sense right now that I need to focus on me.  I need to be all about me.  That doesn’t necessarily mean that I can’t have you around or that I don’t want you around, but I can’t continue to focus solely on you.  I have to start living for me.

I’m so exhausted and worn out with my life—I need to start doing things that make me happy, that bring life back into my life.  And right now, you are dragging me down.  I’m so concerned with your issues and your problems, that it’s consuming me and my disposition.  I feel as though I have your same issues and that’s not the case.  At least, I can’t let it be the case. 

My emotions have no time to be carrying the burdens of two people.  I have enough happening in my own life that I need to start paying attention to.  We can’t keep having two people focused on you and no one focused on me.  That’s not fair. 

I need to get my life back to a level of fairness…I need balance.  I need to be happy. 

Being without you does not make me happy, so that’s not what I want.  But I’m not sure how to get happiness in my life when I’m focused on you.   

So I’m going to need to be selfish for a while as I focus on the things that I enjoy.  I’m going to start saying “no” to people and start doing what I want to do to bring me joy. 

I need to pull away from you a bit and start pulling in more of myself.

Friday, July 15, 2011

All About Me

Today…it’s all about me and celebrating who I am.  Today, I’m not someone’s girlfriend, I’m not someone’s friend, I’m not someone’s daughter.  Today, I’m me—all by myself!  
Today, I say “I do what I want!”  I go where I want to go, I say what I want to say, I live how I want to live.  Today, I don’t do anything that my boyfriend wants or doesn’t want to do.  Today is about me. 

Today, I don’t have to worry whether I was too mean or too nice, too quiet or too loud, too excited or too calm. Today’s I don’t have to worry about how I come across to other people.  Because today—I truly don’t care.  Today, I care about me.

I care about who I am, what I like to do, what I like to eat, and what I like watch—all of it.  Today, I’m only surrounding myself around the people I want to be around.  I’m not playing nice today and I’m not being someone I’m not.  Today, I’m being me.

Today, I’m going to be confident in who I am as a person and not try to live up to other people’s expectations.  Today, who you want me to be and what you want me to do doesn’t matter.  Today, the only person I listen to is me.  No one else has my best interests in mind like I do.  Today, I only think of me. 

Today, I remember all the unique qualities of me.  All the things that make me different versus everyone else.  All the things that let me know that I was created for a reason.  Today is the day that I embrace those qualities, those mannerisms, those traits. Today, I embrace me.

Today is the day that I feel so blessed.  Blessed to be me…with all my flaws, all my weaknesses, all my blemishes…just me!   

Monday, October 18, 2010

Relaxation


Today I’m at peace with myself—I’m not dictated by the past.  I’m not controlled by the pain.   


Relaxation
Eyes wide shut, but senses heightened
Total peace and serenity
Not a care in the world, my heart’s content
From now until eternity.

Inhale the warmth of bliss, ever quenching
Exhale the troubles of life
Feeling like a new creature, new beginning
A virgin to pain and strife.

Unceasing joy upon my face, a constant gleam
A twinkle in my eye
Sunshine seeping from my pores, all-consuming
A never-ending supply. 

Love emitting from my spirit, overflowing
A tangible gift from above
Feeling beauty, splendor, and glee—amazing
All-encompassing like a glove.