Friday, October 7, 2011

Undeserving

The truth about my relationship: Not sure I deserve the great relationship I have with my boyfriend…

I feel honored and blessed to have a man like you in my life.  I’m not sure what I did to deserve you; but nevertheless, I’m grateful.  I’m grateful to have you in my life because you are everything I dreamed you would be; truly.  

Six or seven years ago, I made a list of everything I wanted in a future husband.  I know people have different opinions on whether a person should write down a list of “qualifications” they want in a future mate.  However, it was important for me to write down my “must haves” and “nice to haves” in a future mate because I never wanted to settle.  No matter how many years I was single, I didn’t want to just go for anything. So I made a list…

On the list were “nice to haves” like "athletic" and "comes from a two-parent household," but there was also some “must haves” like "being a Christian" and "treating me well." 

My boyfriend matches so many things that I wanted in my future husband.  He meets my “nice to haves” and my “must haves.”  He is so right for me that it’s kind of scary.  How did I ever find someone who was such a great match for me?  I didn’t even seek this person out; it was like he was sent to me.  I believe God sent this excellent match for me, but why?  What did I do to deserve him? 

I have this great guy who is in love with me. We get along well and we trust and respect each other.  We have a great time together and are truly best friends.  I don’t know what I did to deserve a relationship like this…

So maybe I don’t deserve it, but the fact is I have it.  So I guess I need to start focusing on nurturing it and keeping it as opposed to questioning whether I’ve earned it.

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